Fuck Politeness

The world according to Sam in the City of Sydney Morning Herald Blog infamy:

Men are all the same. Women are all the same. Men and women are NOT the same as each other. But all humans have the same experiences of life**. Men fuck women and women fuck men…or get fucked by them. A real lady *gets* fucked, thereby preserving the pristine state of her manicure and blowdried hair. She *obviously* doesn’t fuck before at least three dates have passed. No-one is gay. [Emphatic nod]

Life consists of little more than hair styling and make up for women. We hold down jobs, but these are funding to find and secure the love of a man…any man. Men are *great* aren’t they? Self respect relies on hours and hours of grooming. To be a good woman you must *incessantly* ask yourself idiotic questions about what men (all men) want. You must spend hours upon vacuous hours contemplating this with all the depth of a wide-eyed Bratz doll. To find the answer, you need only pose it, quote one famous actor, or ask two random twats from work (men of course, women ask questions, they don’t answer them…that would be as unladylike as fucking. And *enjoying it*).

Life consists of little more than maintaining the dick for a man. The dick demands respect from all, bow down and worship the phallus peoples. Self respect for men lies in education, careerism, health, hobbies, extracurricular interests, espousing on the inferior nature of women, holding forth on every subject like a clichéd monkey philosopher, taking comfort in your own innate worth and superiority over all ‘minority groups’, but above all the worship and maintenance of the dick and banging every woman you  come across like the piece of ass she is. Except fat women – yuck. Or women with hair on their bodies. YUCH. Or your wife/partner. BORING. Or FEMINISTS….YYYYUYUCK, run, flee, disperse, every man for themselves, I will use you as a human shield if I need to, Grandma, this is WAY scarier than civil war. *HELP….they want to take my pee-pee away, I KNOW they do*

What is important in the world of Sam…questions of wealth, power and the equal distribution of resources? Questions of equity and justice? [Resounding silence in which frogs make frog noises and tumbleweeds blow through and Sam stares blankly in confusionwhile she tries to make sense of your words]. Um, *no* [shakes head emphatically]. How to keep the men happy!! Yes [claps hands with enthusiasm, the idiotic grin of her blog pic returning now she’s on familiar territory again] much better, keep the men happy and…well…will everyone be happy? Well no, but that’s ok, cos in a couple of days she’ll post on some other vacuous bullshit topic like “How to keep your husband happy by letting him fuck every woman he meets”, “How to blame other women for the demise of society”, “How to ensure you never have an opinion again, thus maintaining your sex appeal”, “The five most uncomfortable-for-women-and-therefore-sexiest sexual positions, or “How to become a contortionist to fulfill his wildest fantasies, thus crippling yourself for no point since you have to let him shag everyone else in order to be a good partner anyway”.

Misogyny in a shiny blond wig. And WHAT is with the point at the cheek thing she does????WTF?

**this is probably because she only ever considers the lives and interests of the most wealthy and vacuous of Sydney yuppies.

Tags: contortionism, dick, fucking, misogyny, Sam in the City, sex, sex appeal, sexual positions