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Fuck Politeness

“This is a revolution, not a public relations movement”

December 5, 2008 By christ

Ok…yet again shall I say I don’t have a problem with people getting turned on by voyeuristic images of people having sex…what I *do* have a problem with is the culture of debasement that appears connected to it. Every fucking day some douchehound finds my blog by searching for things like ‘Underage girls love to fuck daddies’, ‘car rape videos’, ‘grandma raped while she screams’.

If you try to find just ‘regular’ sex [and oh thank god I re-read this, I need to edit to note that I do not mean by this hetero man on top missionary position sex, I just mean sex, whatever your flavour of the day which is consensual and mutually enjoyable, between adults no matter of what gender/how many/what have you], you’re bombarded with ads for ‘tiny girls and MONSTER COCKS’, ‘young sluts totally pwned’, ‘ass pounding with vomit’ etc. Even on amatuer porn sites, all the tags are still geared to this mentality of “They’ll only watch if it’s debasement of the woman”. I am no motherfucking prude people…I don’t give a SHIT about anyone watching people have sex…what I DO give a shit about is rape culture and it’s goddamned monopoly on porn.

And then there’s the whole “Oh but it’s not porn, it’s just pornified, photoshopped women in little to no clothes posed in ‘hey fuck me up the arse Mr’ ways”…like men’s mag pics, right? Like Zoo right? With their charming little “Come Wank Over the Chicks Men Killed” feature. Right. You get to claim it’s not porn (it’s just nekkid pornified chicks for the purpose of wanking) to assuage your unease/guilt, except it’s STILL PEDDLING DISRESPECT FOR AND OBJECTIFICATION OF WOMEN AND RAPE CULTURE.

“Men want to look at naked women, it’s normal” is the usual defence replete as it is with compulsory heterosexuality, and you know, whatever. Except you’re NOT looking at women are you? Women come in all shapes, sizes, colours…we eat, we work, we think, we argue. We have laugh lines and frown lines, and scars, and bodies capable of lugging our heads around. Because we’re people JUST LIKE YOU. You’re looking at a tiny select number of women, selected for their conformity to current standards of beauty whose profession is to not eat, to exercise ridiculous numbers of hours away at the expense of actual careers and life concerns and who EVEN THEN have curves erased, thighs ‘trimmed’, blemishes smoothed, have anything that marks them as different from a mannequin or a blow up doll erased, all for your visual stimulation because the most important thing in the world is YOUR BONER and you couldn’t POSSIBLY get it looking at a regular chick.

Sam in the City writes another half arsed opinion piece on porn. She cites Dr Robi Ludwig – psychotherapist, author and TV personality for couples who live in New York’s Upper West Side. (Who knew couples on the Upper West Side now need their own TV personalities?)

Dr Ludwig’s professional medical opinion is thus:

“I think all men look at porn,” she says. “Some men are more addicted and obsessed than others, but I think some men look at porn. So what?”

Well which is it dipshit, some men or all men?

So, you know, wevs, so what indeed…except really what about the *nature* of porn, of the porn they watch, or of masculine culture the connection between sex and degradation that means you need to go further and further to get the same perverse thrill?

Oh, well Dr Ludwig has an opinion on that:

She says that a man’s affection for porn is due to the enjoyment he gets from watching women being objectified, and the male being in a position of total control.

“It somehow hits the pleasure spot in their brain,” she tells me. “They identify with the male protagonist and it allows them to feel powerful and important. I think also these women are sexual objects and they get to play out fantasies in their brain that they wouldn’t get to play out with real-life women.”

So what indeed! So WHAT if men can only get turned on by turning women into objects, into things? So WHAT if men have such fucked up attitudes to sex that they equate sex with dirtiness, perversion, punishment? So WHAT if playing out scenarios in which the woman is utterly debased, humiliated and hurt for their jerk-off-pleasure makes men feel all STRONG and POWERFUL? So WHAT if that spills over into real life like when men rape strippers and scream they deserved it cos they’re sluts? So fucking what says the…tv personality for couples on the Upper West Side.

I really wish that fuckwits like Sam and Dr Robi fucking Ludwig, TV personality and therefore dispenser of all KINDS of wisdom would stop fucking pretending that what’s at issue is jealous deluded unrealistic whiny chicks who can’t handle that their man (again, responding to the compulsory heterosexuality here) handling his member if he’s not thinking about them. Fucking goddamn it. Beat it all day long if you like. Think about the rest of the goddamned universe if you like. Then I can agree ‘So what?’.

But fuck me dead, this does not happen in a vacuum, disconnected from society, disrespect for women, an lo I say it again: RAPE CULTURE.

At best we have the situation where all day long, every day we’re reminded that we are shiney little trinkets in a man’s world. We’re irrelevant if we don’t brighten the landscape for them, and if we do, we’re just another nameless faceless shiny little thing, to be objectified, wanked over, spat back out, not really people. We’re ranked and compared, having our noses held mercilessly in the knowledge that we’ll never ever be young enough, thin enough, perky enough, shiny enough, subservient/acceptable ‘sassy’ enough to covet the five minute prize of HAWT CHICK…there’s always some other New Object just rushing along to supersede you. And you can do all you want in other areas, but it’s a man’s world, and women are there to be HOT or to fuck off. Kick out the biatch and bring on the porn.

And then we have the porn issue. Leaving aside the fucking cliched aesthetics of *ugly dude bones woman who’s been freshly blowdried, manicured, and donned with tacky gold jewellery who mysteriously happens to enjoy a good dose of jizz in the face every night*, let’s look at the fucking power dynamics. Women are the holes, the receptacles, the object on which to act out all manner of degrading filth. The more she looks uncomfortable the better it is. Cos they’re disgusting sluts to be punished or the frigid bitches who want to take away our porn. Oh looky there, damned whores and god’s police.

So…when this culture is fucking EVERYWHERE, don’t you two morons be up in my face about how it’s all just the bad naughty girlfriend come to confiscate men’s toys.

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