November 25, 2008 WHOSE fault is it that your husband is a cheating prick who humiliated you by conducting an affair behind your back for years? Why YOURS of course!
*Trigger warnings*
Why am I EVEN surprised? I’m not actually…but I am sure as hell not going to NOT point it out.
Sam in the City ponders (in depth) “Who’s really to blame for an affair?”
Yes, before you ask it IS exactly as bad as you think…she just pretends for a while that’s not where she’s going.
So Gordon Ramsay’s been fucking around.
There appears to Sam to be an unprecedented SPATE of this!!! OMG cultural PHENOMENON!!
Is it the *Other Woman*’s fault? Is it YOUR FAULT as the wife??? (Here she pretends to shy away from this even though WE ALL KNOW it’s her ultimate conclusion and I just LOVE that she bounces from one woman to the other without pausing to reflect on the guy that is the one who actually broke the promises here).
Nooo, HONESTLY, *I* don’t think it’s the wife’s fault, *I* don’t subscribe to this….but…really…I heard a story, right and in this story a guy tried to cheat cos his wife was away for two weeks…so this made me think right? If he doesn’t get it at home… (um, what? She was away on a two week holiday who SAID he didn’t “get it at home”) does he feel “the need to stray”. (Oh poor MENZ!!! NEEDS NEEDS NEEDS to live lies! Couldn’t make a choice! Couldn’t be HONEST! Couldn’t have a wank and a nap! Couldn’t grow the fuck up and go pursue an unattached status where he’s free to sleep with whomever he chooses if that’s what he really wants! Coudn’t give his wife a fucking CHOICE in any of this!)
She never even pauses to think that maybe it’s not about the wife/her not ‘putting out’, that these men may well have had a rollicking sex life with their partner…but maybe he’s just a prick? Or maybe it’s about masculine culture and a sense of entitlement? Or maybe…no, too hard…let’s just blame the woman he’s humiliated and decieved. Excellent.
Oh also? When you as a woman are shocked and appalled at a married male friend hitting on your while his wife is away and tell him in no uncertain terms that it’s inappropriate and you are most certainly not intererested? Well you OBVIOUSLY are a liar who subconsciously led him on – and no amount of protesting on your behalf makes a difference since a random dude who doesn’t know you asserts that:
“She must have been doing something to lead him on in the first place,” he explained. “Because men abhor rejection. They must have seen each other in a previous scenario and she may have been giving him the eye. Men aren’t going to start something like that if they weren’t getting the signals.”
Um, if you don’t mind, I’ll beg to differ here as the recipient of MANY unwanted and upsetting advances, both verbal propositions by married men and the upsettingly taken-for-granted-as-normal groping/grabbing/molesting in clubs NONE OF WHICH involved any leading on, any eye-giving, any ANYTHING.
How is this not rape apology logic??
* OH, men KNOW the signals they’re getting more than women KNOW the signals they’re giving*. By this logic whatever a woman says/does/screams NEVER EVER MATTERS cos a man KNOWS when he’s wanted, and SHE STARTED IT and he’s a fragile little puppy and wouldn’t TRY anything otherwise!
Just fuck off and die.
[Oh and anyone who thinks I’m a little *over the top* with the anger/the rape association? Yeah, maybe I’m just fucking grumpy and worn down by pricks finding my site with searches such as ‘Fuck granma screaming whle she’s raped’, ‘rape in car videos’ etc]
Tags: marital affairs, mistresses, no sex at home, rape apology in sheeps clothing, Sam in the City, SMH
- 10 comments
- Posted under Uncategorized
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apublicblogging
said
Today I’m too much in despair over my own gut feelings about what this culture is eventually going to reduce women and their status to, to even be cheered by your as usual excellent take on the whole issue.
I sent Sam an email imploring her to stop with the woman-hating. I had to do something.
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Rachel
said
Actually, you seem completely reasonable to me đ
You haven’t seen my response to the last spam I got, which involved “nun”, “priest”, “incest” and “abuse” in no particular order. The bit that got me was the one part that wasn’t a link, that said “if you’re a moderator, please don’t delete this. Thanks”.
My brain, it melted.
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fuckpoliteness
said
Yeah, I know it’s perfectly reasonable. I just want for other people who’ve not been challenged on this to see that this is all connected. All of it. I’m tired. I’m actually sick and tired of being a woman in this culture.
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fuckpoliteness
said
And I hear you APublicBlogging…
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fuckpoliteness
said
“If you’re a moderator, please don’t delete this”. I…wha?? “C’mon love! It’s not doing any harm to YOU that I’m encouraging people to get off on rape and sexual abuse of children!! What’s it to you if this harmless little link stays here??”
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bluestherapy
said
I agree with everything you said.
Male abuse exists because *men* live in a society where they’re able to avoid/deflect responsibility.
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fuckpoliteness
said
Hey! Welcome to my blogspace Albi/Blues Therapy. Getting a few people swinging by from Hoyden at the moment.
Yeah. Just thanks. Thanks for being a male *and* acknowledging that. Um. That sounds odd. I mean the combination. Not two seperate thanks. đ
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bluestherapy
said
đ
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crankosaur
said
I like the part about how men would never attempt to get on someone they didn’t think wanted them, because it’s not as if research has shown to men to be horrible at telling when women are actually interested in them or anything. Ugh. Gross. What an appeaser this Sam is. Seriously, two weeks? He can’t subsist on wacking it for two weeks? What a tool.
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fuckpoliteness
said
My thoughts exactly! Oh poor man, only him and his hand for FOURTEEN DAYS!!! Selfish, SELFISH wife!